Life happens

Am I blessed or cursed?

My son, Dan, and I plan to run a half-marathon Monday (Memorial Day). He ran in high school and college. He's run lots of races. He runs fast. I have run only a few races in my life and this is the first I've trained for. I run slow. The race will be the longest I've ever run. To say the least, I'm nervous about it.

To get ready for a race we try to build up mileage and speed and then taper off right before the race. Mostly I've been surprised at how well I've done at running. However, I got sick right near the top of my build up a few weeks ago. Oh well, I'll run even slower. Now I'm in the taper off phase.

This last weekend we went to Arcata to see our daughter Ruth graduate from Humboldt. It was beautiful up there, the graduation was great and we had an awesome trip. My wife, Carolina, and I went with her sister, Rebecca, our other daughter, Sarah, and Sarah's husband, Austin. We arrived Thursday night.

Rebecca and I got up early Friday and went for a hike. I wanted to run as well. We hiked for a while and found a logging road into the woods. It was cool and beautiful, perfect for a hike or run. I took off running and had probably the most enjoyable run of my life. Quiet, perfect temperature, lush and beautiful. I felt great. Near the end of my run I was just cruising and enjoying the scenery. My left foot hit the side of a rock and twisted. No pain, but I felt blood rush in. I kept running because it didn't seem to hurt it -- the stretched part did not seem affected by my running.

After the run and hike back, my foot hurt some. I was disappointed and scared. Disappointed because I wanted to run again in the beautiful forest and now it looked like I couldn't. Scared because I thought my ankle might keep me out of the race. I iced it and wrapped it and it got better in a few days, but I did miss out on another run in the beautiful north.

We enjoyed the rest of the trip and made it home safely. I was able to run Tuesday with no problem. I avoided racquetball yesterday as a precaution.

Last night I was watching TV when my right eye started hurting. I've had something called Iritis a few times. It's an inflammation of the eye that can really hurt and needs a doctor's treatment. My eye looked and felt like I was getting Iritis again. I got depressed and cursed myself for staying up too late and treating my eye harshly. This also could affect my ability to run -- when it's bad I need to avoid sunlight and it's hard to see.

This morning it wasn't much better. I began praying a lot. Carolina had some eye drops she let me use and they seem to help a bit. After sleeping on the bus to work my eye was still sore but better. Thanks God! I was trying to be nice to it and was using only my left eye. After getting off the bus I walked across the street to work. At the far curb I tripped and almost fell. There was some kind of metal ring on the ground, about 18 inches in diameter. I managed to step on it with my right foot and in it and trip with my left foot. I stretched many of the same stuff I had twisted on Friday. Again no real hurt, but also it felt wrong.

I went running at lunch as planned. I figured I could stop if it started bothering me. It went well, but I can feel tenderness.

Am I cursed? I haven't tweaked my ankles for years. Iritis has not bothered me also for years. What are the odds I'd tweak my ankle twice, especially since today required me not seeing well, a ring right where I was walking, me stepping on it with one foot and in it with the other. Does God hate me? Does he want me to not run? With all this plus my arthritis, low thyroid, recent Carpel Tunnel Syndrome and normal aches and pains I feel like I'm falling apart. In many ways I'm in the best shape of my life, yet I can hardly keep up with my degrading body.

No, I'm not cursed. God never said it would be easy. If I can't run it's not the end of the world. More probably I'll be able to run, I just need to work through my issues and deal with problems as they arise.

In fact, I'm very blessed. Just being able to run is a blessing -- so many people can't. I have a great family, great friends and a great job. God loves me. These little worries are minor. I need to stay focused on what really matters.